Saturday, October 14, 2006

Remote Broadcast - Toronto

This weekend I am in Toronto. Last night I put on my most fashionable clothing, called up my most beautiful friends and headed to the Entertainment District for a night of debauchery. We decided to throw the 'Devil's Martini' a bone and grace them with our presence. No waiting in line for us...we walked right in with the usual nod to the bouncer. I happily threw $7 down on a drink and found a good place to lean to survey the room. I had about a million places I could have been and I think people were intrigued by my 'I'm too good for this place' vibe. My button up shirt and fashionable jeans really stood out among the crowd and got me noticed. I chatted up all the most beautiful ladies in the room and showed off my best dance moves (it just comes naturally to me). I have to at least give them credit for supplying an incredible music mix. After last call we bounced out of there ASAP and left everybody wanting more. Just another night in the big city.

Okay. Most of that is a lie other than the fact I am in Toronto (or the Big Lie as I like to call it) and we went to that place last night. It is the biggest creep factory in the world. It is sometimes referred to as 'The Mantini' and I understand why. One girl we were with, who is engaged, had to fend off at least 20 different sets of guys coming to chat her up. It looked like they were on a conveyor belt. My favourite part of the crowd is when anybody looks at you, you are instantly judged in a 2 second window. Mullins and I figured that every half an hour they throw out the uncoolest guy in the bar, and we would be #1 and #2 but we made the whole night. I can only assume some guys in sweat pants snuck in. The music was a practical carbon copy of the wedding mix I made back in June. Either I am ahead of the curve or they are 3 months behind it. Taxi cabs refuse to take you if you are going too short a distance, and then when one exiles you all the others lock their door because they know you are bad business. And when you get in a taxi they talk your ear off for 15 minutes about herbal supplements. I now know how to live forever and never get cancer by taking one pill. YES!! All that said...I love the big city and fit right in here.
Posted by WRMB :: 10:29 AM :: 0 comments

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